Watching …..

Happy Friday!

Nothing eventful to report on the adoption front.  I keep watching my checking account to see when funds clear for checks I have written that are pending.  I feel like if I see them cashed I know they went through someone’s hands.  I mean I have the fed ex confirmation that things get where they should but knowing it went from whomever signed it to somone actually opening it and then cashing a check somehow makes me feel good.  Am I weird?  The home study agency should be calling me next week (cuz you know I will be calling them Tuesday if I don’t hear from them on Monday) about scheduling appts.  So … waiting on that. 

Tomorrow is that marketing event.. I sure hope it goes well.  I am a little nervous.. not sure why.  Standing there taking Easter Bunny Pictures doesn’t require any creativity on my part.  Alright Alright.. I am going to admit why I think I am nervous……  It is because the event is in Los Gatos… My ex’s parents live in the ritzy Monte Sereno which is just next door to Los Gatos.  His mom loves these sorts of “fairs” and with the free Easter Bunny Picture (they may be well-off but they are very frugal) I imagine she just might show up with her 1 1/2 year old grandson and her daughter in law (my ex’s wife).  Yeah I am pretty sure I mentioned the ex has a son the same age as Love Bug would have been … ugh.. ANYWAY, I won’t mind so much if she shows up with the kid and the wife.. but I will lose my shit if he walks up with them.  I don’t know why… more jealousy I think than anything else since he has clearly found happiness.  OK.. not that I am not happy… but you know what I mean.. I guess because he has “the family” that I would like.  That I have worked so hard for over the past 4 years. 

Now, let me just clarify….  I am happier today than I have been for a couple of  years.  It feels SO good to not be worried about cycles or medications or dr. appts or will it work will it not and two week waits.  It feels good to know that at this moment I have done everything I can do and I have an agency that is as eager to see me get through this process and meet my child as I am.  I am in a great place right now.  Now don’t get me wrong.. I sometimes worry about getting the photography business growing so I can make as much extra money as possibly for the adoption.  Bringing Apple {that is the name that my friend Brandi has given the child who will one day be home with me… it came to her because of that book that the agency sent me.. see picture below.  NOTE … Apple is NOT the name I am actually going to name my child.. it is just a nickname 🙂 } home is worth every bit of extra work and I have a lot of time to work extra !  hahaha

Well, I hope everyone has a great weekend!  I will fill you in on Monday about the event~


6 thoughts on “Watching …..

  1. Hope the event goes well and you get some good leads for new jobs from it and that the ex nor anyone related to him doesn’t show up.

  2. I think Apple would make a great middle name! 🙂 Running into exes, or their families is always matter the circumstances. Here is my hope for the weekend….1. I hope you don’t see them at all. ANY of them. 2. If you have to see them, I hope that both his baby and his wife are ugly as hell. Does this make me a bad person? Probably. I love you girl. Good luck this weekend..and stir up some business for Apple. You can do ANYTHING as long as it’s for Apple.

  3. Ewww…I hope he doesn’t show up…awkward!

    Haha…”b” wants them to be ugly…that just cracked me up!

    I, too, feel that cashed checks = progress…can’t wait to hear more!

  4. I really hope he doesn’t show up. Yikes!

    Thinking of you sweetie! I hope the event goes well!! And hope you see some cashed checks very soon. 🙂 🙂

  5. well SOME people name their kids APPLE… so why not? LOL 🙂 Just kidding of course… we can come up with something better right? You know we will be talking about it over IM plenty!!! Ha!

  6. Pingback: January 6, 2012 « A Daily Photographic Journal of My Life…..

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