Russia Day 4

I hardly slept a wink.  I kept thinking of MG.  Replaying little details of our day together in my head.  I was excited because day 4 meant I was able to see her twice!  Once in the morning and again in the afternoon.  We got to the orphanage and went straight to MGs house.  She was inside in the playroom.  When you walk thru the door there is a porch type room where they keep the strollers and walkers.  There are two cribs there and today there was actually a baby there.  We peered in thru the pass thru type window and MG was there.  They grabbed MG and brought her to the door, passed her to me and off we went.

I put her in the stroller and Nonna and I took her for a walk.  We stopped by the Principals office to drop off the donations I brought with me.  I brought vitamins, neosporin, diaper cream, anti bacterial wipes, a couple of pairs of shoes, socks, undies, etc.  We then walked out of the orphanage and down the street.  The cars rushing down the street were making her cry so we quickly found a bench and an area to play.   Now, taxis in this part of the world..omgosh..insane.  You see lanes don’t exist in the towns and the ones on highways, well really the center one that keeps direction is the only one that matters.  At least it matters about 80% of the time.  So when I say the cars are flying by, no joke.  They are flying and loud.

So, we played.  We walked and talked.  A nice babushka came over and wished us luck and happiness.  Soon enough it was time to head back as snack and nap was at 11:30.  When we got back, I looked down and she was nodding off to sleep.  I hugged her and gave her back and told her I’d be back at 3.  

After that, Nonna took me to the market.  Lots to see. It is like a flea market.  It was fun, no souvineers.  But they did have a scarf booth and I wish now I had bought something.  Next time.  Nonna took me to the spices booth andi got her special rub. It’s like 20 things mixed together.  They smell amazing and I can’t wait to BBQ some chicken with it.  We then ate some fresh Armenian bread and walked back ti the hotel.  We would meet up again at 3pm.

At 3 I walked to Nonnas apartment and we headed back over to the orphanage.  I got out of the taxi and MG saw me.  The kids were outside in their covered play area.  They picked her up and put her out of the play area.  She walked right over to me and wanted to be picked up.  We stayed inside the yard and spent our time there.  I got her a little squishy ball at the market.  We sat on the floor and rolled the ball back and forth.  She laughed and laughed.  We walked and found another spot.  She ate some puffs, she played with her phone I brought with me.  After 3 visits, she knows which button makes the music and presses it constantly.  The only problem… It is stuck on demo. Mama didn’t realize one needed a screwdriver to change the batteries.  But, she loves it still. We touched leaves.  She really loves to do this.  I saw more smiles this visit than all of them combined.  I could tell she was less nervous and enjoying the one on one time.  I went to put her down and she just wanted to stay up.  It made me feel nice.  

Funny story, and the reason i was putting her down… I brought beach balls to play with, well when I started to blow up, it scared her so I was going to blow one up and give it to the other kids. Of course I asked first and the caregivers said yes.  Well, you know when something is a bad idea but you do it anyway? This was that.  The ball turned the children wild.  They all wanted the one ball! I felt terrible about the ruckus I caused.  Oops!!!

MG and I went back to our spot and continued to play and do our own thing.  In no time it was 5 and they started bringing the children in.  Soon MG had to go.  I passed her off, gave her a kiss, a wave and said paka paka!  

Back at the hotel I looked at the pictures on my camera.  You can see in the pictures how much more open she was to playing today vs Monday.  She is laughing, smiling, just more loose.  I wish I could show you…. The pictures and the thoughts of the day make me smile.  Yet tonight they also make my bursting heart break.  Knowing I have to leave her tomorrow kills me.  Just as she let’s me see the child in her soul, I leave.  I am so so sad.  Once our visit is over I just wanna get home and gather this paperwork so I can get back here to her.  I know the caretakers do their best, but she deserves so much more.  She deserves to be home with mama meeting her family and playing with friends.  

I think I will ask tomorrow if I can see where she sleeps.  For some reason I need to know.  So I can imagine it and her there resting her head at night.  I will do my best to keep busy and pray pray pray the time goes quick and the judge likes what she sees… 

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10 thoughts on “Russia Day 4

  1. I am crying for you.. I am literally at my desk eating my subway turkey sandwich talking to you on IM and reading your blog at the same time… crying…

    She needs to be here with us, so we can love her, play with her and show her how very important she is to our family. When I saw her today, her eyes look different, like hopeful. How is that possible at such a small age, I don’t know. She is gorgeous. She is amazing with her smile and her big eyes. All this waiting is nothing now for you, she was meant to be yours.

    I am proud to be her auntie and I can only hope that I will be as wonderful as you have been to my children. Move you sissie and I love my little angel over there! (thats what she is to me, an angel who has fond her way home)

    Blah.. prenant tears all over the place!

  2. How fantastic that she is at an orphanage that lets you spend lots of time with her, and you get to see some other kids. Glad she is feeling happy around you. Enjoy tomorrow, which is already upon you.

  3. Oh! This made me cry!!! I am so glad that mother and child have finally found each other. I know leaving, even for a short time, will be difficult and so I pary that the time until your return goes quickly.. xxoo.

  4. Gosh, you and your sister are making me cry! I hope the time until your girl is home with her family is the shortest on record.

  5. Just catching up today on the last 3 days. I can’t imagine how hard it is to leave and go home without her. Hoping the time goes quickly until you are able to go back and get her to bring her home with you.

  6. How could the judge not like what s/he sees? I think it’s very apparent how wonderful of a mama you will be and provide her the loving home and family she deserves – and you too! Hope the time passes quickly and she will be in your arms soon!

  7. Jesus! Between you and Deb i’m crying too! Love you, can’t wait till you bring her home.

  8. An angel she is and she was meant for just YOU, Tracey! You said it just right in one of your posts, that she has made all the wait worth it. The next few months will be the hardest of all, but God has brought you this far, and he will continue to make you stronger, until Mama and MG are together at last!!! 🙂 Praying for you and your little angel, and that it’s no time at all til she’s home in her Mama’s arms!!!

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