Fun, Sun and Tough Choices

It is hard to believe that June is almost over!  Soon enough (on Thursday) Vera and I will have been together for 9 months!  Before you know it, we will be celebrating our ONE YEAR METCHA-VERSARY!  Oh yes, I have a big post to write on that one!  That will be July4th so watch out for that 🙂  There will be lots of info on how she is doing, what she has learned, how she has changed and the awesomeness that is Vera.

So lets see.. what have we been up to?  Not too much.  Just out and about enjoying long walks in the evening and extra cuddles in the morning.  Swimming continues to be the most popular activity.  Vera simply loves it and really is a fish.  She swims around as if she has had lessons moving her arms and kicking her perfect little kick.  I should have video taped her yesterday when she would swim from one side of the pool to the other.  It was so cute.

There has been an educational change of plans.  As you know Vera had a spot to start with the Russian Immersion Preschool in July.  We visited several times and what I had hoped would be a great way to stay connected to her Russian culture wasn’t so fun for her.  She became very quiet at the school on our last visits.  She hesitated even playing.  Then, at home, she began refusing to speak the little bit of Russian that we do speak.  I had to sit and do a lot of soul-searching.  Maybe it was bringing back thoughts of her life before.  It was clearly having an effect on her.  Then went and visited the original preschool we were going to go to (non-Russian) and what a difference.  She was eager to chat with the teachers and played freely without me by her side.  I am sure part of it was she was/is comfortable with English at this point.  I continued to think long and hard and realized that I needed to back off and look at her cue’s and follow her lead.  I mean isn’t that what I am supposed to do as her mother?  So, Vera will not be in the Russian Immersion Program.  She will be starting regular preschool come September.  Of course you know me, I will continue to find ways to share her culture with her.  We still belong to the Russian Mothers Playgroup, we will watch plays, go to festivals, read books, look at pictures, try food and chat non stop about all that is Russia.

In non Vera news.  I normally try to stay out of debates.  I hate involving myself in the right and wrong involved in adoptions.  But I have noticed A LOT of chatter these days with regards to phot*olist*ings.  I have read a lot of mean things.  I have seen people posting nasty comments on what I consider to be good people who want to care for special needs children.  I just don’t get it.  I mean there has to be proof that the photo’s help bring attention to these children.  There has to be proof that had they not posted photo’s families would be unaware of the need to care for these orphans.  Isn’t it about the well-being and the future of the children?  I have a ton of respect for these families.  I hate seeing their names published as if they are doing something wrong or not out of love.  It is just so so sad.

Well that is all for today!  Have a great week!

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3 thoughts on “Fun, Sun and Tough Choices

  1. I loved the idea of your having a preschool that would help preserve Vera’s heritage and language. We don’t have anything like this in our area, so the idea was wonderful. But, we have friends that adopted recently that their child stopped answering to her Russian name days after they picked her up. Apparently this happens sometimes. It’s as if they are afraid to be taken away from the nice people speaking another language. And Katie has had zero interest in my efforts to preserve her language through Russian cartoons, etc.

    I think you get super kudos for trying to do the best thing for her from the beginning, but listening to what she really needs and adapting your mommy perspective. That’s a sign of an awesome mom. 🙂

  2. I think it’s a right decision, Tracey. Life in an institution is hard no mater how nice personnel is there, and it looks like kids keep this memory for the rest of their lives. So, I’m glad that Verochka is getting all American 😉 oh, by the you know that she is a paizan of Gorbachyov, right? he was from the same area, from Stavropol’skiy krai…

  3. My guy was an orphanage favorite and hung on to his language forever. I loved the idea of finding classes and such but after he left the Jewish Community day care program last year his Russian is gone. He never seemed to have a conflict over his orphanage, so far, in terms of distancing himself. He talks sometimes about wanting to visit his ‘groupa’ and to go to Russia. Just yesterday he listened to a really long set of stories in Russian. I don’t know how much he understands though; he can’t speak anymore but a few phrases. You definately got to do what is right for Vera. It’s been a while since I checked in and so got to read 3 posts of wonderful updates and beautiful photos.

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